Does dissociating mean I’m going crazy?
Dissociation can feel very strange. And pretty horrible, too.
It can also be an incredibly confusing experience, and one you might feel as though no-one else would understand. You may have even tried to describe the sensation of being 'trapped behind a pane of glass’ or ‘living life through a keyhole’ and received blank stares from friends or family.
It is completely natural for people to begin to worry, then, that something might be really really wrong. We have even met some people who have gone as far as having a brain scan to try and figure out where the strange sensations are coming from.
The good news is: no, you’re not ‘going mad’.
Dissociation and depersonalisation experiences are part and parcel of how the human brain works - just like anxiety, fear, excitement, or sorrow. As a society, we simply talk about them less than we do other experiences - the result being that we might not recognise dissociative experiences for what they are, and we might struggle to find other people who recognise them, too.
At the Midlands Dissociation & Depersonalisation Centre (MDDC), we talk about dissociative experiences as being the next step after the famous ‘fight or flight’ response. If your body cannot defend you physically, it ‘shuts down’ to at least protect you mentally. This might be because something terrible is happening that you cannot escape (as is so often the case in trauma), or because the fight or flight response is being triggered over and over for days, weeks, or months at a time (for example, when living with chronic stress). Some people even notice that particular emotions set off their dissociation, as the body protects them from internal “danger”.
As one of our clients once put it:
‘it’s like the fans of a computer switching on because the system is overheating’.
Maybe this explanation is enough to help you see where your dissociative experiences are coming from. Are there some responsibilities you can drop or pass on to someone else? Are you putting too much pressure on yourself about too many things? Is there a significant event in your past that is still setting off your body’s defences in the present day? Do you struggle with tolerating or understanding your emotions?
If you need some support untangling your answers to these questions, or working through what they bring up for you: we are here. With over a decade of experience in dissociation and depersonalisation, we recognise what you are experiencing, and we are here to help. No judgement, no blank faces, and we promise we will never think you are ‘crazy’.
The Midlands Dissociation & Depersonalisation Centre offers support for people with dissociation, their loved ones, & their clinicians. MDDC is led by Dr Emma Černis, a qualified and HCPC-registered Clinical Psychologist, and an international leader in the field of dissociation research.
